temple near Mysore

We had been talking a lot lately about us or my going back to Mysore for a few months. Then (11/24) in Lewis' First Series led class, there was a shift. Again. Sixtyni Yogini turned after one (!) Sun Salutation to throw an unneeded layer behind her mat. It's a casual movement most of us do almost every day of practice after warming up. 

My back muscles wrenched and locked and nonchalance was arrested mid-movement. The left side -aaahooooow, the QL?—not again! Foolishly (in hindsight) stayed for the class and tears skidded down my face and neck during Savasana. I hurt but that wasn't the reason for the salt, nor was self-pity. It was a sense of relief and mental (not muscular!) release. Knew I would have to re-examine my (ego or something else?) relationship to this practice. 

Just a few days before, my sculpture class had a metal pour, and I had lifted a 50# bucket of bronze and carried it from van to classroom (SY is invincible, right?). Then, weekend before there were those intense 3 days - mornings and/or afternoons during David Garrigues workshop. 

A very stressed quadratus laborum. 
The same muscle that's given me grief for about a year. 

Know I must listen to my body. I know also I felt stiff and clunky that morning before class. Know I cannot fight truth.

But I do wonder:
Wouldn't anyone's back be screwed up after stressing one's back as I did the week before that class? 

Is the back fragile because of age? 

Would this have happened at age 30?  

Is humility the main thing I am learning from this practice? Am I not also learning acceptance?

Am I back to square 2 or 3 from a year ago? 
(Answer I think: no, the healing chiropractor, the bed, and experience will - I hope - support a speedy recovery)

Is the "I-can-do-almost-anything" self - being forced to let go?


No comments:

Post a Comment